


that one song for the moon (and about its light)

by withluvsan (lostlovelis)



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Hongjoong!MoonGod, M/M, Mingi!SunGod, San and Yunho are mentioned briefly, Strangers to Lovers, angst with open-ending, based on a jão song, based on a vitor kley song, but not really, human!seonghwa, more like Strangers to Friends to Lovers, they fall in love like fools
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:15:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26591254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostlovelis/pseuds/withluvsan
Summary: The Human used to sing to the sky every night, as an ode for their loved one. Unhappily, it was not the Moon.No. The Human had fallen for the stars.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 4
Kudos: 20





	that one song for the moon (and about its light)

**Author's Note:**

> So, it was supposed to be part of a small project with a group of fellow atiny writers on twitter, but unhappily it didn't work out :(
> 
> If you guys stumble upon their works, please, give them a lot of love!! They worked hard too <3
> 
> * Based on the songs “A Tal Canção Pra Lua” by Vitor Kley, “A Última Noite” by Jão and “Mist” by ATEEZ

_Before we get started, let me tell you a story. The story of how the Moon fell._

_Once upon a time, the Moon. We all know who the Moon is, right? That giant luminous globe hanging in the sky, filled with emotions and who gives us a beautiful gaze. That one filled with white shadows and dark sides that we will never be able to see. That’s the Moon. A mystery by itself._

_Once upon a time, a human. I didn’t bother to remember their name, so let’s just call them Human. The Human whose Moon fell for. They were not the most beautiful, neither talented nor special. It was just a common human, but the Moon fell for them. For their beautiful eyes and glorious voice._

_The Human used to sing to the sky every night, as an ode for their loved one. Unhappily, it was not the Moon._

_No. The Human had fallen for the stars._

_The Moon did not bother, though. As long as the Human sang every night, they could handle not being their loved one. However, once a month the Moon would give their back to the Earth, and to the Human, crying their heart out because of their one-sided love. But, as I said before, if the Human sang every night, the Moon didn’t care._

_One night, the Human didn’t sing. The Moon felt lonely that night, so they made a small deal with their older sibling, the Sun, to be able to go out during the following day. The Sun agreed, hesitantly. They knew what happened to the Human, but they thought it would be better if the Moon saw by themself._

_The following day, the Moon went out during daytime, using the light of their older sibling to hide in between the clouds, passing unseen by the humans while searching for their loved one. They searched all day, only finding out about the Human in the afternoon. The human had fallen dead, drowned in the river while trying to touch one of the stars that were reflected in the water three days before._

_During that night, the Moon had cried, mourned over the Human they have never been able to protect._

_-I want to go down! - the Moon yelled at the Sun, painfully - I want to find them and love them! - the Sun refused their wish once again, scolding the Moon about being so selfish. The third time the Moon asked about it, the Sun gave up, knowing that their younger sibling was too stubborn to simply give up._

_-You can go down, but you are not going there alone. I am going with you - the Moon wanted to complain, but they could not risk being forbidden again. The Moon agreed with their older sibling and they left the sky, leaving two puppets to stay on their place while they were on earth, just to come back and check things twice in the year. In the moment they fell, the day turned into a night._

_The humans called it an Eclipse._

_The Moon was a lonely lover, searching for a special soul among thousands, even millions. They never gave up._

_The tale says that that one person who always dies alone, without ever loving someone else, can be the Moon, who has vowed to not love someone else beside their first love. They live and die without ever loving purely._

_~_

Be patient, our story can be a bit confusing.

~

Now that you have a background, let me tell the real story that you really came for.

There was this kind smiley boy who was majoring in Chemistry. He was innocent, silly, and open-minded. He also was gorgeous and intelligent beyond every student in that university. He was just too perfect to be true with his sweet smile, warm eyes, and never-ending politeness. Everyone was in love with him or was at a certain point. Everyone except this young man right here, with his big glasses and giant mountain of books. He didn’t care about the university’s little star, he had too much on his mind to worry about. Until a certain disaster makes their lives collide in the most unexpected way.

Park Seonghwa already had too much to worry about. His grades, his friends, his new roommate arriving in the following week. His things were all over the place, just like his mind. He was a good listener, but also an excellent daydreamer. How did he keep his grades above the roof? He would study nonstop the entire night before an exam, even if he already knew all the content. He was never satisfied.

-Hyung! - Wooyoung’s voice broke inside his thoughts, waking up the boy for the nth time on that break between classes. Seonghwa snapped out of his daydreaming state, looking at his loud dongsaeng. Yeosang wasn’t nowhere near to keep his boyfriend under control and Seonghwa would have to deal with Jung on his own - Did you hear anything that I said? - he didn’t, and Wooyoung knew just by the confused look on the elder’s face. The lavender-haired male sighed, waving a hand and dismissing any comments Seonghwa could make, coming back to blabbing at himself.

The duo made their way to their next class, not really caring about dodging from hurried and miseducated students in the hallway, until a certain short boy bumped into Seonghwa’s chest at the top of a small flight of stairs, gasping before rolling the seven steps until the ground, where he stood still for a few seconds before groaning in pain.

-Hongjoong! - they heard a deep voice yell from the end of the corridor, as a red-haired male ran in his friend’s direction. Seonghwa woke up from his state of shock to run downstairs and aid the platinum haired boy, receiving a death-glare from the taller boy by his side.

-I am so sorry. I wasn’t paying attention - Seonghwa apologized, being pushed away from the red-haired male.

-I am fine, Mingi. Just a few bruises. I will survive. Look - Hongjoong kept a warm smile on his lips while sitting up and showing his bruised arms, looking at Mingi with small sparks shining in his eyes. Seonghwa didn’t dare to look at them for too long, getting up and standing by Wooyoung’s side.

-I am really sorry. I didn’t intend to push you - Seonghwa apologized again. Hongjoong got up with Mingi’s help, the taller taking his bag from his shoulders and scolding him for running in the corridor, before turning to Seonghwa and looking at him in the eyes. Seonghwa saw a spark in Hongjoong’s eyes. Something he never saw before.

-It was my fault. I was running and bumped on you. I am sorry - Hongjoong bowed at Seonghwa, taking the opportunity of all of them being distracted to take his bag from Mingi and run away again, without waiting for a proper answer. Just like that, he ran upstairs again, Mingi yelling behind him and leaving Seonghwa and Wooyoung dumbfounded at the end of it.

-Did you see it? - Seonghwa asked, back to walking to their next class.

-See what? - Wooyoung didn’t seem to pay attention to Seonghwa, since he was now typing on his phone continuously, probably messaging Yeosang.

-His eyes, they shone. I don’t know how to explain - he really couldn’t. There was no way of explaining what Seonghwa saw in a logical perception. What he saw wasn’t a simple shining light. Seonghwa swore he could see a small moon inside of Hongjoong’s pupils for a brief moment before it turned back to dark brown.

-Hyung, I think you are a bit stressed - Wooyoung laughed, tugging his phone inside his pocket, and directing his attention towards Seonghwa. He soon saw how the boy was already sailing on his own thoughts and simply laughed at himself, not caring about disturbing his friend.

~

The next week, Seonghwa was ready to receive his new roommate. Room half empty because the previous one left for an exchange in China and would not come back until their third year. Seonghwa spent half of the semester alone, with Wooyoung spending the night over when he felt too lonely, until the coordination assigned him a new roommate. He missed San, but he couldn’t spend the rest of his academic life waiting for his friend to come back.

He heard a light knock on the door during his study session, close to 07 pm. He had given up on waiting for his new roommate at that time, drowning himself in his books about Methodology and Experimentation while taking notes here and there to revise later – probably a night before his next exam, but who cares –.

-Jung Wooyoung, I told you to not come here if you had not fixed up your relationship. I have nothing to do with your stupidity! – he yelled, before opening the door, ready to snap the crap out of his friend for bothering him on a Friday night.

-I think you should sort the things out with your friend. He seems nice – Hongjoong had a playful smile on his lips and two big suitcases by his side, staring at Seonghwa while leaning against the door frame – Hi, I am your new roommate – Seonghwa spent a few seconds looking at Hongjoong, eyes full of curiosity before coming back to his senses and smile.

-Oh, hi. I am sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you. I thought you were someone else – after a moment of silence, the brunette offered to help Hongjoong with his luggage, only to be turned down.

-It’s okay. I can carry it. It’s not that heavy – he assured, lifting the suitcases like they were made of feathers. Seonghwa could not believe that such a small body could be so strong. He saw as Hongjoong placed one of them on his clean bed, opening it to expose his badly organized clothes and a few books the size of his head.

-Are you a superhero or what? – he said, jokingly, while trying to carry the other bag. He barely lifted it from the ground.

-I think I’m just strong. It’s nothing to be impressed about – Seonghwa shrugged, closing the door.

-I am not. Do you mind being silent? I want to study a bit – he asked, sitting at his desk again, not caring about Hongjoong’s answer before putting his earphones and taking his highlighter. He surely heard a small chuckle behind him, but he didn’t care enough to turn back.

~

The following week, Seonghwa swore he didn’t intend to, but he avoided Hongjoong for a few days like a plague. A small, kind, and soft plague with shiny eyes and bubbly personality. He couldn’t help but feel weirdly sad around the boy, like a movie with no happy ending. It was overwhelming in an awkward way. Seonghwa felt like there was an invisible wall between them. Every time Hongjoong tried to get closer, Seonghwa felt the urge to run away.

Hongjoong would always appear from somewhere unknown, dragging Seonghwa close and showering him with lots of affection. Seonghwa, however, only felt annoyed by the constant attention. He didn’t mind being Hongjoong’s roommate, but something felt oddly off. As if Hongjoong was trying to prove something by befriending Seonghwa. That’s why Seonghwa avoided him most of the time.

He would spend every day on classes and his free time was always used to revise some content as an excuse to hide in the library all day. He only went back to the dorms after 10 pm, too tired to fight with Wooyoung about avoiding his roommate and his own friends. He surely didn’t want to avoid them, too, but it was almost like a self-defense system. He shut down everything that could distract his mind, overworking himself to the limit with no apparent reason.

Sometimes Seonghwa’s problem was his own mind.

He used to overthink things, turning harmless thoughts into nightmares that could cost him various nights of sleep and a few meals if he wasn’t in the mood.

All because of a certain platinum-haired boy with sweet giggles and warm eyes.

Every night, when Seonghwa came back from his shower, he would find Hongjoong sitting in the corner of his bed, waiting for the brunette to come back from his long day of- Seonghwa didn’t even know why he was avoiding Hongjoong. He just couldn’t stand the sadness around the boy.

And even after being avoided for a day straight, Hongjoong would look at Seonghwa with that big eyes of his and Seonghwa would see the moons hanging inside of it for a second before it disappeared again and he tugged himself under his covers, hiding from the world once again before the following morning. As if nothing could reach him under his blankets.

~

-I am telling you, Mingi. He doesn’t treat me like the rest of people do. For lord’s sake, he has been running from me the entire week! – Seonghwa couldn’t contain himself from hearing the boy’s monologue from behind their room’s door, feeling like an intruder, but also craving for some information more reliable than the campus gossip – You know that I always remember everything when I turn 18. I cannot stop searching now. Even with this shitty curse making everyone fall in love with me. And he simply didn’t! It must be a signal, hyung – Seonghwa frowned, trying to recover Mingi’s age from the back of his mind, but he got nothing – Yes, yes, I know the story from backwards, but, hyung, he has so many stars hanging on his eyes. It is just… beautiful. Prettier than any galaxy I could ever remember – Seonghwa, then, opened the door, watching as the boy sitting on his own bed turned his head to him in a second.

-Sorry, did I scare you? I am leaving already, don’t worry – Seonghwa felt guilty, but tried to hide any trace of it from his face, running to retrieve a few books he had to return to Yunho, his classmate.

-Wait, Seonghwa! – Hongjoong turned off his phone and held Seonghwa’s wrist before the brunette could leave the room. Suddenly, Seonghwa felt tears running down his cheeks. He didn’t dare to look at Hongjoong, shutting his eyes closed and trying to understand why he felt so overwhelmed with only a touch – Oh, no. Seonghwa, I am sorry! – Hongjoong let go of Seonghwa’s wrist, retracting his hand and taking a few steps back. Seonghwa stopped crying almost immediately, wiping his tears with the sleeve of his sweater before looking at Hongjoong.

-What are you? – and for the first time, Seonghwa saw the moons on Hongjoong’s iris fully, taking place from the dark brown and turning it into a shiny shade of silver. Hongjoong sat on his bed and held his knees, hiding his face in between them, as if it could help him to avoid the question – What you just did… why are you… - Seonghwa didn’t know what to ask first. He was lost and being close to Hongjoong made all his emotions go crazy, as if someone put them inside a blender and turned it on.

When he approached Hongjoong, he felt like something was squeezing his chest, making his eyes turn blurry because of the tears. He gasped loudly, clutching the fabric right above his heart, before running through the door, getting some distance from the boy in his room.

As he put more distance between them, he could feel his lungs becoming lighter and it was easier to breathe. Seonghwa didn’t understand why, but he was not scared of Hongjoong. Of course not. He feared all those feelings hitting his chest and making him numb until he fell on his knees in front of the dorms.

Seonghwa had never felt so much in such a short amount of time.

-Seonghwa! – Wooyoung’s voice pierced through the silence of the campus while running into his friend’s direction, kneeling by Seonghwa’s side in the grass and holding his body close – You are cold. Why are you out here like this? – Wooyoung got no answer, waving his hand in front of his friend’s face for a few seconds and waiting for a reaction, but none came. Seonghwa was trapped in a state of trance, following Wooyoung’s guidance to stand up and walk back to the dorms, being led by the hand to his room, occupied by him and Yeosang.

-Wooyoung, what happened? – Yeosang jumped from his bed, making his way towards his friends and helping Wooyoung to sit Seonghwa in the bed. Seonghwa sat still, not talking with his friends and looking straight forward. Small tears gathered at the corner of his eyes, but his expression was emotionless. Wooyoung ran a hand through his hair nervously.

-I did nothing! When I found him in the courtyards, he was already like this! – Wooyoung looked at Seonghwa with worry, and then he saw it. He saw these small things dancing in Seonghwa’s eyes, forming tiny drawings in the dark brown of his iris – He has stars in his eyes! – Wooyoung blurted, taking a step back before receiving a slap on the back of his head.

-It is not time to be poetic, Wooyoung! – Yeosang glared at his boyfriend, who looked deeply offended.

-I am not! Look by yourself. There is something inside his eyes! – and so did Yeosang, gasping in shock and disbelief as he examined their friend’s eyes closely – He literally has stars inside his eyes, hyung! – like if he had taken the chance, Seonghwa moved his head in his friend’s direction, snapping out from his dreamland and staring at the couple for a while before a few tears fell from his eyes. Seonghwa didn’t seem to notice, though – Hyung?

-Wooyoung? Why am I here? – Yeosang sat by Seonghwa’s side, wiping his tears with his thumbs and looking at Wooyoung curiously.

-I brought you here. Don’t you remember? You walked all the way here from the courtyard holding my hand – Seonghwa shook his head, tears still staining his cheeks, but he wasn’t really crying. It was unconscious – Why are you crying? – Seonghwa lifted his hand, touching his cheeks and finally noticing the tears. His lips twitched, but he couldn’t hide as his eyes became even more teary.

-I am not – he stated, looking at Wooyoung with an afraid expression – I am not crying. Why is this- – he trailed off, looking for an explanation. It was near 9 pm and he was crying in his friend’s room without a proper reason. The only explanation was- – It is because of Hongjoong – he mumbled.

-Why would it be Hongjoong’s fault? – Wooyoung sat on Seonghwa's other side, holding his friend’s hand – Hyung, what the hell is happening? – Seonghwa leaned his head against Wooyoung’s shoulder, letting out a sob and squeezing his hand. He knew his friends were looking at each other, thinking about how to help him without making things worse.

-He has moons in his eyes, Wooyoung – he sobbed, finding words in the middle of the way – Like, literally moons inside his iris, with its shadows and waves, the silver light and all – he waited for Wooyoung to laugh at him, saying that he was becoming crazy, but it didn’t happen. He simply felt a soft caressing on his back.

-We believe you, hyung – Yeosang caressed Seonghwa’s hair lightly, a sad smile on his lips – We believe you, because you have stars in your eyes, too. Real stars shining inside your iris – Seonghwa whipped his head up, looking at his friends for a second.

-What? – he muttered. Wooyoung let go of his hand and got up, looking for a hand mirror on his things and handing it to his best friend. Seonghwa took it eagerly, looking at his reflection and staring in awe at his eyes. He could see entire galaxies inside his dark brown iris, dancing around and shining in the most beautiful way.

A knock on the door made him wake up from his small daydream. He didn’t understand why, but for a second, he felt warm like a spring day. His tears stopped running down and dried immediately, gaining a gasp from Yeosang, who was amused.

-Park Seonghwa? – a deep voice called from the door frame. Wooyoung was blocking the door, arms crossed on his chest and stern expression on his face, but Mingi easily towered him, peeking inside the room, eyes locked on Seonghwa’s – We need to talk – Seonghwa cowered, hiding his face behind Yeosang’s body and clinging onto his arm – It is about Hongjoong. He needs your help – Seonghwa looked at him over Yeosang’s shoulder and his breath hitched. Mingi had shining red eyes staring directly at him, like a setting sun – Please – he pleaded. Seonghwa let go of Yeosang and stood up, trembling legs and glossy eyes glaring back at Mingi before sending him a brief nod, feeling Wooyoung’s judging eyes on his back as he passed for him.

He followed Mingi back to his room, hearing Yeosang and Wooyoung’s steps behind him. He knew they probably were holding hands and looking for any sign of danger.

Seonghwa didn’t know why he was so worried about Hongjoong, he only was. It felt like being attracted by a magnet.

Mingi stopped in front of Seonghwa and Hongjoong’s room, standing beside the door and mentioning to Seonghwa to get in with a nod.

-He is scared and overwhelmed. Be patient, please – Seonghwa nodded at the advice, turning the doorknob and getting in.

At first, it felt like being hit by a wave of sadness. It soon turned into fear and an unbearable amount of guilt. In the end, all that lasted was loneliness. So much loneliness that Seonghwa felt like he could cry at any second, but he didn’t. He didn’t because someone was already crying.

Curled in the corner of the bed, he saw Hongjoong sobbing and trembling while holding his legs. The boy’s face was tugged on his knees, his body shaking viciously and knuckles turning white by the force he had been holding the fabric of his jeans.

-Hongjoong – Seonghwa sat by his side on the bed, reaching for his hands slowly. Hongjoong’s hands were cold against Seonghwa’s, like holding a pot of ice cream – Hongjoong, look at me – he pleaded. Hongjoong shook his head, refusing to look up, to look at Seonghwa – I am sorry for running away earlier. I panicked when you- – Seonghwa waited as Hongjoong lifted his head, choosing to stare at the ground, not to him.

-I- I am sorry – he stuttered. Seonghwa felt his heart clench on his chest by hearing Hongjoong’s voice so low and fragile – I scared you. I- I didn’t mean to. I wasn’t supposed to touch you, b- but you were leaving and- – Hongjoong let out another sob, tugging his head into his knees again and letting his body shake as Seonghwa watched. Seonghwa just let him, giving him time to calm down once again.

-I am right here, Hongjoong, but I need you to talk to me. I need to know what’s happening – Hongjoong lifted his head once again, looking at Seonghwa with teary and scared eyes. Seonghwa, otherwise, was amused by Hongjoong’s eyes. The silver light from before faded into a crystalline and light shade of blue. Seonghwa felt like he was staring directly into a shiny gem of aquamarine.

-You- You have stars in your eyes – Hongjoong stated, expression full of amusement as he stared back at Seonghwa’s eyes – They are beautiful – Seonghwa smiled, holding Hongjoong’s hands in between his own.

-So, are yours, Moon – Hongjoong stared at him in disbelief, not trusting his ears enough – It’s been a long time, isn't it? – Seonghwa chuckled, looking at Hongjoong’s hands. They were so small and delicate, with thin lines drawing on his palms and skinny fingers trembling against Seonghwa’s hands – I saw something earlier, after you touched me. I need to know. What are you, Hongjoong? What are we? – Hongjoong lowered his eyes once again, biting his bottom lip nervously.

-Can I hug you? I will explain everything later. Please, just let me hug you – Seonghwa didn’t know if it was a good idea, but he agreed, immediately feeling Hongjoong’s chest colliding with his own and his arms rounding his body.

Seonghwa felt oddly light. He felt like a heavy stone had been taken off from his shoulders just by holding Hongjoong so close.

He pulled Hongjoong even closer, feeling the shorter’s breath hitting his neck and he clutched Seonghwa’s shirt on his fists. Seonghwa let him, caressing his hair, but holding his waist with his other arm. He noticed Hongjoong’s body stopping shaking and his grip becoming loose. He had fallen asleep on Seonghwa’s embrace.

-Cute – Seonghwa whispered, laying Hongjoong on his bed and covering him with the blankets. He was about to turn away when a small hand held his wrist, not allowing him to go.

-Stay – Hongjoong’s voice was hoarse and low after crying for god-knows-how-long. It made Seonghwa’s heart ache and he sat on the bed again, brushing the younger’s bangs from his eyes and smiling sadly.

-I am here. I am not leaving again – Hongjoong nodded, half-way back to the dreamland again. “Leaving again”. That was something Seonghwa didn’t quite understand. Why did he feel like Hongjoong could slip through his fingers at any second?

For a couple of hours, Seonghwa simply stared at Hongjoong, after turning off the lights and sitting on his own bed.

He watched as Hongjoong slept peacefully; the moonlight making its way to his snowy hair and soft features, turning his skin whiter than milk and tracing the lines of his lips that were peachy colored. Seonghwa was craving for touching the skin of Hongjoong’s jawline, following up to his lips, his delicate nose and expressive eyes, coming all the way back to his neck and drawing invisible lines on his collarbones.

Seonghwa fell asleep just like that: eyes trapped on Hongjoong’s figure and mind going crazy over all the things he felt on his chest. Maybe it was just a dream.

It’s dangerous to be around the Moon during the night.

~

Seonghwa woke up with the sound of a knock in the door and low whispers.

He breathed deeply, gathering courage to open his eyes and face the morning sunlight which came in through the window, stretching his body loosely and throwing the blankets to his side in the bed, turning his head in the door’s direction and looking for whoever woke him up.

-Hongjoong? – he mumbled, hoarsely. A tiny shape came into his sight, carrying a sad smile and puffy eyes - Were you crying? – Seonghwa sat up on his bed almost immediately, looking at his roommate in worry. Mingi was standing behind Hongjoong, door closed on his back

-Can we talk? I need to explain some things to you – Seonghwa nodded, rubbing his eyes and shaking off his tiredness. He was feeling oddly sad and Hongjoong’s gloomy eyes didn’t help a bit to lift his humor. Seonghwa knew something was wrong.

-Will it take long? I had a weird dream last night and my head hurts – Hongjoong glanced at Mingi, who sat by his side on Hongjoong’s bed.

-What kind of dream? – Mingi’s deep voice broke the silence in the room and Seonghwa felt a shiver run down his spine.

-It was nothing much. I have always had the same dream since I turned 18. The moon, the sun, the stars and me, drowning – Hongjoong paled and Seonghwa frowned. He was used to these weird dreams, always being shaken back and forth under the water, trying to reach something intangible, a light.

-Nothing else? A face, a voice, nothing? – Mingi asked. Seonghwa pondered for a second, retrieving all his memories of his dreams. Nothing, but an unrecognizable voice.

-No – Seonghwa shook his head, looking at the duo right in front of him – And I don’t think this is what you want to talk about – and he was right. Hongjoong switched uncomfortably on his place, but Mingi didn’t take his eyes off him.

-You are right. We want to talk about last night, and your eyes – Hongjoong immediately gripped on Mingi’s jacket, looking at him with wide eyes – What? We need to get straight to the point, Hongjoong. We can’t keep wasting time. You know we can’t – Hongjoong nodded hesitantly, releasing Mingi’s arm and focusing on Seonghwa again.

-What’s wrong with my eyes? – Seonghwa tilted his head to the side, feeling slightly lost. His mind was still a bit hugger-mugger from sleep as he tried to push away the memories of his dreams.

-You have starry eyes, Seonghwa. Literally – Seonghwa laughed, tilting his head back and holding his pillow.

-Did I speak while I was sleeping? Are making fun of me because I dreamt about it? – Hongjoong’s expression fell, as he clung on Mingi’s arm again – I think I fainted last night, and I am sorry, but why are you joking about something I dreamt about? – and there was Hongjoong’s puppy eyes, looking for help from Mingi. Seonghwa felt something sting on his chest in a fraction of second.

-It wasn’t a dream, Seonghwa – Mingi’s eyes shone red, his iris being entirely engulfed by the captivating color and Seonghwa couldn’t help but gasp in surprise, jaw falling as he saw Hongjoong’s eyes turn into two shiny silver moons – We need you to listen to us carefully – Seonghwa nodded, trying to keep up with the new information. If wasn’t a dream, it meant-

-Wait! – he cut them off, tightening his grip on his sheet – It means that what I saw yesterday was real, too? The man in white clothes? – Mingi frowned, motioning for him to keep going – If yesterday was real, then after Hongjoong touched me, I left the room, right? – Hongjoong nodded, leaning his head against Mingi’s arm – I went out and stopped on the courtyard. From there, everything is confusing. There was a man wearing white and the moon gaining the shape of a human and walking away. And then- – he trails off, lowering his gaze and fixing it on his hands – And then I was drowning again, trying to reach something way out of my limits – Hongjoong stood up from his place and took a few steps closer to Seonghwa, holding the man’s hands while kneeling in front of him.

-You know, there’s a story about the Moon – Hongjoong’s voice was sweet, his thumb caressing Seonghwa’s hand delicately – They say that the Moon once fell in love with a human, but the human was already in love with the stars – he laughed bitterly, not looking up at Seonghwa – The Moon didn’t care.

“ _One night, the human died, drowned on the river trying to reach the stars, the Moon cried and swore they would find the human’s soul again._

 _To go down on earth, the moon agreed on being cursed by the men who wears white, being followed by their older sibling, The Sun. Every human would fall in love with them, but if the Moon finds the right one and they refused the Moon’s love, it was over. The Moon and the Sun would leave earth and go back to the sky._ ”

-I don’t understand – Seonghwa lifted his eyes briefly, getting caught on Hongjoong’s stare.

-You hold the stars in your eyes, Seonghwa – Hongjoong’s voice was pure amusement, as if he was looking at something he had never seen before – You are the one I’ve been looking for during thousands of years.

-But you have only until the next new moon to decide to accept or not Hongjoong's feelings – Mingi cut them, scrolling on his phone.

-Sun! – Hongjoong yelled, scaring Seonghwa who felt the boy's hands turn inhumanly cold.

-You know we can't waste time anymore! - Mingi yelled back, as the heat inside the room increased significantly. Seonghwa untangled his hands from Hongjoong’s and stood up, glaring at them with the most shining stars on his eyes.

-I wasn’t drowning because I wanted the stars – Seonghwa stated, closing his fists and walking out the room – I drowned because I wanted the moon – he closed the door behind his back with a loud thud, walking away from his room straight to the only person he knew could calm him down.

-Hyung? What are you doing here? – Seonghwa broke down in the moment he heard Jongho’s voice, letting his body lean against the younger’s – Woah! Hyung, what happened? – he asked once again, before pulling his friend inside his messy room. Jongho let Seonghwa roll himself on his blankets and tug his face on his pillow before sitting by the older’s side. He caressed Seonghwa’s hair for a while, waiting for him to calm down – It’s okay. It’s me, Seonghwa. You can talk to me – Seonghwa nodded, letting go of the blankets and asking silently for a hug, receiving it promptly.

-Sorry for disturbing you so early – he apologized, face buried on Jongho’s neck.

-It’s okay. I just came from the gym. You didn’t wake me up – he assured. Seonghwa could feel the scent of lime from his shampoo and Jonghos’s favorite perfume around the room – You are still using the same clothes from yesterday. Did you take a bath? – Seonghwa shook his head, feeling a poke on his side as Jongho loosened the grip around his body – Go and take a shower. A few of your clothes are on the same place as before – Seonghwa nodded quietly, not sure if he could trust his voice in the moment.

Seonghwa took a quick shower and wore a set of sweatpants he had left the last time he slept at Jongho’s room. The younger’s roommate had a girlfriend and was always out, leaving the Choi on his own most of time.

-What is bothering you, hyung? – Jongho asked, letting Seonghwa lay by his side on the bed and hug him again – And don’t even try to lie to me. I am your best friend, your ex and a Psychiatry student. You cannot fool me, Park Seonghwa – Seonghwa whined, pulling up the blankets and trying to hide his face from his friend. Mission failed – I will kick your ass from this bed, and you know I am not bluffing – Seonghwa quickly uncovered his face, sighing loudly. He knew Jongho very well and was aware that the student would kick his ass for real.

-The dreams I have, I think I found out the reason – Seonghwa’s voice was low as he kept messing with Jongho’s shirt with one of his hands.

-Do you mind elaborating it? – Seonghwa was aware of Jongho’s gaze on him, slightly concerned.

-Two people said that I am part of some ancient myth. This is stupid – he mumbled.

-Because of your stars? – Seonghwa wiped his head on Jongho’s direction, staring at him.

-How do you know about the stars? – Jongho tilted his head, messing with Seonghwa humid hair.

-I always told you, hyung. You have stars in your eyes. Not the metaphorical ones. They are real. Even though I can’t see it anymore, I know it was real – Seonghwa gulped, sitting on the bed and looking at Jongho with wide eyes.

-Why can’t you see it anymore?

-Because I am over you. I stopped seeing it in your eyes once I stopped loving you in a romantic way. It happened a few days before our breakup, when we finally stated that we worked better as friends – Jongho had a friendly smile on his lips, body still laid on the bed as he looked at Seonghwa – Hyung, I can say for a fact that you are scared of something, but don’t let it eat you from inside. If you want to love, then love. You deserve to be happy. Every piece of happiness is worthy it’s price if it won’t harm others. Don’t let your guards up forever, because some people don’t have much time to wait for you.

Seonghwa didn’t know how to answer, so he simply laid back by Jongho’s side and curled closer to the boy’s body, seeking for his warmth and cuddles, being immediately hugged and spoiled with welcomed attention and affection. He let himself fall on sleep in the boy’s arms, griping onto that last string of peace before facing the real storm.

~

-Hongjoong? – at that same night, Seonghwa made his decision. He spent the rest of the day talking with Jongho, letting the boy know about everything Mingi and Hongjoong told him. Jongho gave him his best advices and made his best to help Seonghwa understanding his feelings. It took them hours for Seonghwa to admit he indeed felt something for Hongjoong, in first place.

-Seonghwa? What are you doing here? – it was past 10 pm and there they were; standing on the rooftop of the dormitory, with nothing but the moon and the stars above their heads. The moon was their only source of light, but Hongjoong was weirdly easy to see. The fluffy snowy hair, the moon-like eyes, the tiny shaped body. Seonghwa could distinguish Hongjoong from the shadows easier than he could breath, and his lungs were strangely heavy right now.

-I came to give you an answer – Hongjoong was standing in the corner of the roof. A large hoodie engulfed his small frame and the wind was running its cold fingers through the boy’s hair. Seonghwa was scared.

-You didn’t need to come all the way here just to dump me, Seonghwa – Hongjoong smiled. Seonghwa took a few steps closer to the border, the moon following his moves closely.

-We need to talk – Seonghwa offered his hand to Hongjoong, motioning for him do come down from where he was standing. Hongjoong didn’t move.

-You don’t want to be with me, Seonghwa – the elder felt like someone had hit him on the chest, taking away his air just like that – You said earlier that you drowned because you wanted the Moon. Why would you lie to me? – Seonghwa could see the pain behind Hongjoong’s moon shiny eyes, begging for him to lie once again.

-I didn’t lie to you. Do you know why I wanted the stars so bad? – Seonghwa took another step forward, holding Hongjoong’s hoodie by its collar. Hongjoong’s eyes were on same height as Seonghwa’s. The moon and the stars were seeing each other closer. One was full of doubt and the other was full of pain. Hongjoong shook his head, eyes locked on Seonghwa’s, none of them being able to release themselves – Because I wanted to give them to you.


End file.
